On rekindling friendships and impact-fulness

My deepest apologies for not posting for the last three weeks! I’ve been a little bit side-tracked (read: OVERWHELMED) from attempting to learn the Japanese language. I’m running into an issue with my brain where the other languages that I kinda speak are getting mixed up and only gibberish is coming out. I know that in the linguistics world this phenomenon has been actively researched and there’s an actual name for it. So, my language scholars, what is that called? I’m curious! But, in posting this, I really want to show what Japan looks like right now because it’s beautiful, but I also want to ramble a little about people in our lives.

Japan’s Ashikaga range

I cannot count the number of times that I’ve been told ‘people enter our lives for a reason’. Yes, this is true and it’s been proven to me over and over again. But ultimately I think the greater lessons come from when people leave our lives. When someone is participating in your everyday life, you often do not fully appreciate them. Yes, you might be grateful and extremely happy during the times with them. But, It is only when they are gone or unreachable that you realize just how much of an impact that they had on your life. Particularly the gaps that their leaving left in your heart and soul; double that when you were especially close.

Forgotten temple in the mountains

 

During the de-thawing process that is my third cup of coffee, I’ve lately been thinking quite a bit about people in my life. Do I make an impact upon them? Have they made an impact upon me? What was it that I made them question…was it who they are? Where they have gone or been? Do people think about me and wonder where I am? I asked a few people this question and I got mixed answers. I didn’t ask them if they missed me, that’d be kinda awkward (but I do think it!).

Many people are not sure if they’ve changed someone’s lives for the better or for the worse and I am no different. I am a teacher. I interact with individuals who are looking for answers every single day of my life and often ask them questions that make them consider who they are. Why? Because I had amazing teachers in my own life that asked me those same questions. It transformed me from being an arrogant, self-adsorbed person into who I am today, or at the very least got me on the right path. Even to this moment, I am always asking myself where I am, what I’m doing, and who I am doing it with. It’s a bit of a dichotomy in that I am actively living in the present, breathing in each moment, but I also have an eye to the past and the future. It’s difficult not to in our current world.

The blossoms in Japan have a huge and profound impact for only a few weeks

Ask yourself this. Do you have an impact on the people in your life? If you do, what is that impact? Have you ever been impacted by someone, even if you only knew them for a short amount of time? How did they impact you? 

     I think that you’ll find looking back at people in your life, you’ll remember individuals who, for only a short moment, burned like dying out stars and lit up our world for just that briefest of moments. Recently, I’ve taken to talking those people in my life. Or trying to. Staying in touch is difficult when you are on the other side of the world but I try my hardest. It’s sometimes disheartening attempting to rekindle a friendship through something like Facebook, because it’s not often that someone is on at the same time as you. But, I try nonetheless.

With some people, I picked up the relationship like nothing ever happened. Despite the 3 or 4 year gap in between our conversations. With others, it’s like pulling teeth trying to get a real conversation that doesn’t involve asking ‘How are you?’ and leaving it at that. I am not one for small talk. I can chat about the weather like anyone else, but if you have me for more then five or ten minutes, I’m going to ask a harder question. One that I might not know the answer to. It’s the people that readily have these conversations that I anxiously await talking to. These are the people that, despite years of silence, continue to inspire and influence where I am going and how I am viewing life. They make me remember those tiny memories that I forgot. Sitting outside watching stars, listening to a piano being played late into the night or remembering a moment of shared silence and understanding. Chances are you think about these moments and the people you shared them with often. Nostalgia is a powerful thing, but it doesn’t have to be a sad one.

Nostalgia can be as lovely as the explosion of colors. It’s gone now, but I will remember how it made me feel

Go on, talk to that long lost friend or lover. Don’t just ask them how they are. Ask them who they are and what life has taught them since you last spoke. Let them know that you think about them. Even if they don’t respond, at some point they will read that and know that someone appreciates them. It will make their life all the better for it.

 

Share some long lost love and if you can..rekindle those friendships. It’s never too late to say ‘Hello’.

Budding Bakery Bread Banters…Pt. II

Pita bread is simple and easy, it’s also very quick which makes it ideal for ‘same day’ cooking. Sourdough bread is a bit more time consuming, but it’s just as easy to make. However, I should say that the bread-baking purists/hardcore-ists out there will go out of their way to make sure that EVERYTHING is perfect for a sourdough bread. That’s why this is not going to replicate your favorite bakery’s sourdough goods. Truthfully, they have access to machines and ingredients that the typical person does not. If you had dough conditioners, the means to create perfect cooking environments, and years under your belt…there would be customers outside your door as well. Let’s face it. Good sourdough is freaking awesome. This is an excellent recipe, again borrowed from the wonderful Mark Bittman, and it makes equally excellent bread; however, don’t be discouraged if it’s not on par with the corner shop’s.

 

There is a downside to this recipe. If you don’t properly cover it, it can cause your kitchen or tent (yep, backpacker friendly) to smell a bit like beer. Which, personally, I kinda enjoy that smell. It’s not…pleasant, but it’s not awful. I know that when I’m making sourdough bread; I’ve done it correctly when I smell that smell ($10 says you just started humming Lynyrd Skynyrd).

 

Just like the last recipe that we covered, this is another essential to the basics of bread baking. In fact, the only thing that’s this recipe even remotely difficult is the amount of time that it takes to make and the temperatures for fermentation are a bit more picky. The preparation to baking time is around 3 days. It’s not that terrifying and it opens up an entire realm of different possibilities for your budding bakery (I’m on an alliteration kick lately.). Three days is 3 days of just watching it sit in your kitchen and watch for bubbles. Truly, I promise it is no more involved then the forethought that if you want bread on Sunday, you should start this on Thursday or Friday.

 

Here’s the beautiful thing too, that 3 day start date only happens once. Because it’s for the ‘starter’ dough. Once you have a healthy batch of happy yeast, you can mix, rise and bake in just about the same time as any other bread. WIth that said, let’s get down to making a starter.

 

Le Ingredients: 

1 1/2 cups of flour (If you have fancy flour save it for later) 

1/8 teaspoon of yeast (Dry or Instant)

1 1/2 cups of warm water (remember, almost finger ouchies [~120°F to 130°F or 49°C to 54°C]

 

This cannot be more easy. Get a big bowl and mix the flour and yeast together then add the warm water. Simple. Done? Good, cover that and walk away for the next 2 or 3 days.

Yep, all bread photography starts with piles of white powder

 

See? That’s wasn’t terrifying at all. Your dough is going to start foaming and eventually it will develop that slightly sour beer-ish smell.

The signs of happy yeast

 

A quick note on sourness though. You can leave it for longer but it will develop more and more fermentation and that will carry over into the final bread. If you like super sour sourdough (which I do) feel free to let it sit there and stew a bit longer. Once you are satisfied the next step is to simply feed the starter and keep some for the next batch.

 

 

Here’s what you need: 

 

2 cups of flour

1 1/2 cups of tepid (that means lukewarm, which is as vague as tepid, so just warm.) 

 

Toss those into your starter dough and mix it. Done! Now cover it again and let the dough rise for about 6 hours. Again, if you want to put it in the fridge and get a slower rise time ( which amounts to more complex flavors and textures…) you can.

 

After it’s risen take half and simply set it aside. This is your new starter for the next batch! Keep it in the fridge and start this step! You never need to make starter again. Unless you let those yeast die, but your not cruel and heartless are you?? Try to make another batch of bread within 2 weeks. This is such good bread that it will disappear very quickly; you should not have a problem needing to make more.

 

With the half that is going to become your bread, add the following: 

 

1/2 teaspoons of yeast 

2 teaspoons of salt

1 cup of flour (Rye, Wheat, Bread, All-Purpose, 1000 year Georgian Monk Flour, etc.) 

 

Add that in and start slowly adding water (~1 cup or so) like before. Until you get that shaggy ball of dough, just slightly sticky and let it rise yet again! Remember, if you feel like it’s too wet or too dry, slowly add more flour or water until it gets the consistency you want. If you happen to just dump the entire water in, which I’ve done on numerous occasions, it is not ruined. Just add more flour! Your bread not rise as much, but it will still taste the same.

 

The final step is to shape the dough as you wish. Like before, at the moment I don’t have access to an oven, I make flatbreads and small rolls in my skillet. A hot rock works just as well, and an oven is ideal. But work with what you have! By and by…and by, if you do have an oven, the proper temperature is ~375°F to 400°F or 190°C to 240°C. Watch your bread for golden brown goodness and then remove it! I would give you a time period, but each loaf is different. A skillet takes about 3 minutes for each side, so if you want instant satisfaction (and who doesn’t) use a skillet.

Delicious and Pretty!

Remember longer rise times make more complex flavors!

Next post? Since I live in Japan now, I’ll teach you how to make gyoza wrappers or “egg roll” wrappers from scratch! Happy cooking!

3 Beautiful Bachelor/Bachelorette Bread Banterings…Book I

Allow me to paint you a picture…it’s 7am in the morning, you are blinking at the sudden glowing fireball in the sky wondering where it came from, the coffee is just starting to perk you up and your brain is slowing de-thawing from last night’s debauchery (I’m not here to judge..it’s okay.). Suddenly from the window you smell the heavenly scent of fresh baked bread and almost, just almost, you reach for your coat. But wait…no…the bakery down the street charges like $8 something for a tiny, though mouth watering-ly tasty, bun. Oh yeah, and the line stretches around the corner and there’s always that guy on his cellphone at 7:30am with a business call. Who has a business call at 7:30am anyway? Plus, that $8 dollars was spent on a disappointing, expensive microbrew made with Unicorn hair and the tears of a Mermaid.

Well, you’re just out of luck. Another morning with a stale, overpriced loaf chalked up with Diacetyl Tartaric Acid Esters of Monoglycerides and other silly dough conditioners that are just as hard to pronounce. Rejoice my friends. I’m going to teach you how to make, what I believe, to be 3 of the most versatile bread recipes that I know of. Starting with the easiest and least time consuming. As full disclosure, my recipes are loosely based on the titular Mark Bittman, whom if you aren’t aware, has two of the best cookbooks period. How To Cook Everything and How To Cook Everything Vegetarian.

Anyway…the first recipe!

Fresh Pita (or a basis from anything else you can think of) 

This one is dead simple and I happen to always have a batch or two in my freezer, if not sitting on the windowsill waiting to be accompanied with my meal. I use this primarily as a pita bread. Instead of forming a loaf after a rise, I just punch it down and roll it out a bit. Why? Because in my travels I’ve found that access to an oven is…well…normally nonexistent. But access to a fire, stove top or electric skillet? Always.

     Truly, this would make a fantastically moist and rich bread if you baked it in an oven. Better yet, inside a ceramic pot within an oven. That is beautiful bread. But lots of us don’t have access to those things. So a skillet or hot rock it is. Yep, these ones are backpacker friendly. So let’s get down to business.

Ingredients: 

3 cups of flour (I use all-purpose because it’s cheap, but if you have fancy triple-sifted organic stuff…use that!)

2 teaspoons of yeast (dry or instant yeast…either is fine due to the short rise time) 

2 teaspoons of salt 

1/2 teaspoon of sugar  

3 tablespoons of olive oil (my suggestion? Try using a flavored oil as it will lend it’s taste to the bread) 

~1 1/2 cups of warm water (right before testing finger ouchies..which for you science types is ~120°F-130°F) 

     Got those? Good, that’s just about the hardest part. For your first step, you simply have to mix together the dry ingredients. That’s the salt, sugar, yeast and flour.

Mix together your dry ingredients

     Now add the oil into that and mix it up until the dough seems like there’s a lot of tiny balls of oil locked in the dough. Honestly just whip around with a whisk, there’s nothing fancy to this step.

Add the oil to the mixed dry ingredients

Next slowly, did a mention slowly? SLOWLY add your water. That does not mean pour it slowly all at once. That means add a little bit.

Slowly add water to the mixture

     Mix the dough, add some more water, mix it again, continue this and then stop when your dough forms a slightly sticky ball. Done. Easy no? If your dough seems too sticky, you can add flour using the same process to get a more manageable ball.

Continue to add and mix until it starts sticking together

Stop once you get a ball form

     After this step, just cover it and walk away for about 2 hours. Obviously, you can allow it to rise longer and it will develop a more complex flavor, however, 2 hours works well for our purposes here. Although my typical method is to get to this step the night before and toss it into the fridge to rise overnight.

Get creative!!

Once you rough has risen you can knead it and form it into whatever shape you want, freeze it for later, or slice it up into smaller chunks and roll out some pita bread.

It fits so nicely in my containers when I’m meticulous!

     To make these in the skillet, simply turn it on to Medium-Medium High with just a little oil (or be a bit more indulgent and use butter) and fry them for about 4-5 minutes on both sides. They will get puffy and nicely golden brown.

Glorious

Just tonight I used this dough to make fresh hamburger buns and it was fantastic. All the juices of the meat and oil got absorbed but this bread is strong enough not to get soggy. That’s all there is to it! As a side note, you can also slice these and fill the middle in true ‘Pita’ style.

Happy bread making!

 

 

3 Beautiful Bachelor/Bachelorette Bread Banterings…Book I

Allow me to paint you a picture…it’s 7am in the morning, you are blinking at the sudden glowing fireball in the sky wondering where it came from, the coffee is just starting to perk you up and your brain is slowing de-thawing from last night’s debauchery (I’m not here to judge..it’s okay.). Suddenly from the window you smell the heavenly scent of fresh baked bread and almost, just almost, you reach for your coat. But wait…no…the bakery down the street charges like $8 something for a tiny, though mouth watering-ly tasty, bun. Oh yeah, and the line stretches around the corner and there’s always that guy on his cellphone at 7:30am with a business call. Who has a business call at 7:30am anyway? Plus, that $8 dollars was spent on a disappointing, expensive microbrew made with Unicorn hair and the tears of a Mermaid.

Well, you’re just out of luck. Another morning with a stale, overpriced loaf chalked up with Diacetyl Tartaric Acid Esters of Monoglycerides and other silly dough conditioners that are just as hard to pronounce. Rejoice my friends. I’m going to teach you how to make, what I believe, to be 3 of the most versatile bread recipes that I know of. Starting with the easiest and least time consuming. As full disclosure, my recipes are loosely based on the titular Mark Bittman, whom if you aren’t aware, has two of the best cookbooks period. How To Cook Everything and How To Cook Everything Vegetarian.

Anyway…the first recipe!

Fresh Pita (or a basis from anything else you can think of) 

This one is dead simple and I happen to always have a batch or two in my freezer, if not sitting on the windowsill waiting to be accompanied with my meal. I use this primarily as a pita bread. Instead of forming a loaf after a rise, I just punch it down and roll it out a bit. Why? Because in my travels I’ve found that access to an oven is…well…normally nonexistent. But access to a fire, stove top or electric skillet? Always.

     Truly, this would make a fantastically moist and rich bread if you baked it in an oven. Better yet, inside a ceramic pot within an oven. That is beautiful bread. But lots of us don’t have access to those things. So a skillet or hot rock it is. Yep, these ones are backpacker friendly. So let’s get down to business.

Ingredients: 

3 cups of flour (I use all-purpose because it’s cheap, but if you have fancy triple-sifted organic stuff…use that!)

2 teaspoons of yeast (dry or instant yeast…either is fine due to the short rise time) 

2 teaspoons of salt 

1/2 teaspoon of sugar  

3 tablespoons of olive oil (my suggestion? Try using a flavored oil as it will lend it’s taste to the bread) 

~1 1/2 cups of warm water (right before testing finger ouchies..which for you science types is ~120°F-130°F) 

     Got those? Good, that’s just about the hardest part. For your first step, you simply have to mix together the dry ingredients. That’s the salt, sugar, yeast and flour.

     Now add the oil into that and mix it up until the dough seems like there’s a lot of tiny balls of oil locked in the dough. Honestly just whip around with a whisk, there’s nothing fancy to this step.

Next slowly, did a mention slowly? SLOWLY add your water. That does not mean pour it slowly all at once. That means add a little bit.

     Mix the dough, add some more water, mix it again, continue this and then stop when your dough forms a slightly sticky ball. Done. Easy no? If your dough seems too sticky, you can add flour using the same process to get a more manageable ball.

     After this step, just cover it and walk away for about 2 hours. Obviously, you can allow it to rise longer and it will develop a more complex flavor, however, 2 hours works well for our purposes here. Although my typical method is to get to this step the night before and toss it into the fridge to rise overnight.

Once you rough has risen you can knead it and form it into whatever shape you want, freeze it for later, or slice it up into smaller chunks and roll out some pita bread.

     To make these in the skillet, simply turn it on to Medium-Medium High with just a little oil (or be a bit more indulgent and use butter) and fry them for about 4-5 minutes on both sides. They will get puffy and nicely golden brown.

Just tonight I used this dough to make fresh hamburger buns and it was fantastic. All the juices of the meat and oil got absorbed but this bread is strong enough not to get soggy. That’s all there is to it! As a side note, you can also slice these and fill the middle in true ‘Pita’ style.

Happy bread making!

 

 

On the virtue of Facebook

Disclaimer: 

This post is not for anyone but myself if you don’t care to read more about me and my past then I highly suggest you wait until my next posting. I will be teaching you how to make fresh pita bread from scratch but until then…you’ve been warned.

Secondary Disclaimer: 

Indeed, I am praising Facebook. But only because of what it CAN do…not what it DOES do. Want a reality check? Go look through you Facebook photos from start to finish. Come back to me and tell that you didn’t just have new perspective on your life. That is what Facebook should do, reconnect you with life, family and friends. Not tell me to like your silly personality test from Buzzredtwitgawk.com

I have lived an amazing and wonderful life. As you well know I just went through a pretty major breakup and I needed a change. That change was Japan. Was it the right choice? I don’t know, but here I am now and I’ve been asked to tell the Ashikaga Board of Education about my life, what I like and what I have done, etc. That is a seriously hard question to answer and I’ve been thinking about it pretty heavily lately. Even without the added incentive to divulge my life in front of very well dressed people drinking tea.

Definitely one of the best things in Japan. The tea is ridiculously good.

The conclusion that I came up with is that my life is astoundingly good and I have been blessed with so many amazing experiences and even more fantastic people. I can honestly say I have grown into far more then I ever imagined possible. There are times in your life when you are sad and lonely; wondering what happened to all the happiness that you used to have. Honestly, I’m going through that right now and, though I rarely do this, I’m looking at my old Facebook photos from when I first began Facebook. Something like 8 years ago, maybe 9..10 (How old is Facebook?), I’m not really sure. What I am sure of is that there is nothing for me to be sad about and the experiences that I’ve gained and the lessons I’ve learned… well some people travel their entire lives and don’t learn them. I’ve been blessed to learned them at the ripe age of 27.

Upon looking back, I started tearing up and crying with a giant huge smile and thousands of warm memories wrapping me in the embrace that only years of life can bring. Years of life in where you are truly given the freedom to be who you are. Not a year has gone by that I haven’t challenged myself and grown into more then I am. I didn’t even realize it upon looking back on Facebook. I’m striving unconsciously to discover even more facets of what I can do and where I belong in the world. So looking back I found myself reminiscing just a little bit about what I’ve done in each of these years. More as a reminder that I am somebody in the world and I have made an impact. So here it goes…the virtues of Facebook.

It will remind of just how much life you have lived and how far you’ve grown: 

Is this one of the worst photos I could find? You betcha.

Oh man, look at that punk high school kid fresh out of school and in a big college up on Lake Erie. Damn, I thought I was something. Little did i know that I am not an artist, at least definitely not a good one, and there were plenty of other actors/artists/musicians out there that were far far better then me. But you know what? I had something to prove and I worked hard at getting better.

Every college study group…ever.

Alas, to no avail. This was really a year of discovery for me; just like it is for most people in their first years of college. I tried acting, arts and sports but nothing really helped me to find out who I was, what was my mark and how was I going to make it. In fact, this year is pretty much summed up by putting on a facade and pretending to be someone else. The relationships that I had and the friends that I made are mirror images of this fact; gone and never heard from again. A distant and fleeting shadow in my blur of college. Callous…but true. Then I found these photos again…

It reminds you of the best moments of life and the people that made it that way:

Because sometimes a reminder is all that’s needed

 

Awesome, now we’re getting somewhere. This is the beginning of me figuring out who I am and what I have done. My life just rammed into full stop and a reality check was waiting for me in the form of Outdoor Odyssey. I’m not going to explain what that organization is. It is far to complicated and the tangents that I would go on will make this the longest post in the history of WordPress. But here, this place…here is where I learned that I could impact lives.

There’s always a helping hand

Occasionally that required placing my Chacos in unsavory areas

Here is where I found the friends who I firmly believe are unmatched in the world. The family that will follow me and support me, still, to this very day. This place is where I discovered who I was and what I was meant to do. This is where I learned that I wanted to be a teacher and this is where I found my spot in the world.

The days in between those times just aren’t even worth mentioning. It was college and shit happened. ODO, that was real, that was life and just thinking about it and all the experiences that I had makes everything bad in the world seem so small and all the good things just jump out. Putting how the next 3 years of life felt for me is rather hard and I don’t really think I can do it justice…also it won’t mean anything to my readers that aren’t from Outdoor Odyssey, plus honestly I don’t care if you get it because this post is mine and mine alone. I’m actually quite surprised you’re reading this sentence. Kudos!

Pictured: Possibilities

It forces nostalgia upon you and challenges you to remember when you thrived:

And then Cheley happened. This took what ODO taught me and put it the test. I was placed in charge of a massively huge program and put into the higher echelons of staff at a camp that barely new me and only saw me on paper before meeting me. I showed up 2 weeks early and wandered around the mountains of Colorado in the winter time, took some awesome photos and generally twiddled my thumbs and ate ramen.

Not pictured: Ramen

 

 

But then the thaw came and I was ready to unleash a new torrent of life into people all around me and unleash I did. Everything that I was and everything that I new about art, teaching management, lessons, inspiration and how to keep people in the loop was firmly pressed into my initial surge of energy. I met some fantastic people from all over the world and I am pleased to say that I have friends from almost every major country, I’m quite sure every state in America, and that’s pretty cool.

Because to me that means that I’ve grown out of my box and that is success in this life. Cheley, you are an amazing place, you change lives.

Occasionally life can be capture in a photo

You changed mine and gave me the courage and confidence to know that I can take control and I can make something better then what it was and leave it primed and ready for the next visionary to come.

Decided not Facebook

It gently (read: VIOLENTLY) nudges you into being productive about life goals: 

After my brief stint in the Colorado Rockies, I ventured over to the beautiful redwood forests of California and lived for a time as a naturalist. Gained the name ‘Zephyr’ or ‘Zeph Zeph’ and learned even more about myself. I gained another family that I never suspected I would have.

Yep. I’m a hippie teacher. What? You didn’t know?

Just like the amazing support that I receive from ODO, I now receive equal support from the SMOE natties. My time there not only firmly grounded my beliefs in education, but it also deeply rooted the idea of change and revolution into my mind.

It has always been my dream to open my own school. At first, I was basing it on other existing systems but then after living in a system with no system, except for the one that the teacher creates, and that allows you to engage with all intelligence types and age groups…whew! I found that I wasn’t just dissatisfied with the education in the world today…I HATE it and I want to change it. To bring it closer to the experiences that I’ve had at Cheley, at SMOE, and at ODO.

Power should be returned back to the teacher. Tests should abolished, grades should be kept but they should be…informal evaluations and talks about how you’re doing. Administrations should not do anything but keep the school running smoothly and there should be little to no crossover between the two parties. In fact, administration SHOULD be teachers and should also be rotated on a regular basis. Nothing gets stale that way and new ideas are always flowing. Each should simply trust the other to help out when it’s needed and to do the job that is given to them. By this, and only by this, will you allow a teacher to open up to their lessons and truly be educators, not simply instructors. You can’t teach from a book.You teach from life.

So now after 2 minor life crisis, a hiatus to the desert, an extended backpacking trip to run from society, a failed attempted at grad school, a journey halfway across the world and a crushing blow to my happy face…I’m ready to trust in education and life again. So bring it Japan. Let’s see what you got.

Ah. Cherry Blossoms…well played Japan. Well played. Rebirth it is.

 

And there you have it…just by looking at Facebook photos I was reminded of life and all the great things it’s given me. Go on, go look back…see what you’ve forgotten. Maybe you’ll find new perspective too.

On the virtue of Facebook

Disclaimer: 

This post is not for anyone but myself if you don’t care to read more about me and my past then I highly suggest you wait until my next posting. I will be teaching you how to make fresh pita bread from scratch but until then…you’ve been warned.

Secondary Disclaimer: 

Indeed, I am praising Facebook. But only because of what it CAN do…not what it DOES do. Want a reality check? Go look through you Facebook photos from start to finish. Come back to me and tell that you didn’t just have new perspective on your life. That is what Facebook should do, reconnect you with life, family and friends. Not tell me to like your silly personality test from Buzzredtwitgawk.com

I have lived an amazing and wonderful life. As you well know I just went through a pretty major breakup and I needed a change. That change was Japan. Was it the right choice? I don’t know, but here I am now and I’ve been asked to tell the Ashikaga Board of Education about my life, what I like and what I have done, etc. That is a seriously hard question to answer and I’ve been thinking about it pretty heavily lately. Even without the added incentive to divulge my life in front of very well dressed people drinking tea.

The conclusion that I came up with is that my life is astoundingly good and I have been blessed with so many amazing experiences and even more fantastic people. I can honestly say I have grown into far more then I ever imagined possible. There are times in your life when you are sad and lonely; wondering what happened to all the happiness that you used to have. Honestly, I’m going through that right now and, though I rarely do this, I’m looking at my old Facebook photos from when I first began Facebook. Something like 8 years ago, maybe 9..10 (How old is Facebook?), I’m not really sure. What I am sure of is that there is nothing for me to be sad about and the experiences that I’ve gained and the lessons I’ve learned… well some people travel their entire lives and don’t learn them. I’ve been blessed to learned them at the ripe age of 27.

Upon looking back, I started tearing up and crying with a giant huge smile and thousands of warm memories wrapping me in the embrace that only years of life can bring. Years of life in where you are truly given the freedom to be who you are. Not a year has gone by that I haven’t challenged myself and grown into more then I am. I didn’t even realize it upon looking back on Facebook. I’m striving unconsciously to discover even more facets of what I can do and where I belong in the world. So looking back I found myself reminiscing just a little bit about what I’ve done in each of these years. More as a reminder that I am somebody in the world and I have made an impact. So here it goes…the virtues of Facebook.

It will remind of just how much life you have lived and how far you’ve grown: 

Oh man, look at that punk high school kid fresh out of school and in a big college up on Lake Erie. Damn, I thought I was something. Little did i know that I am not an artist, at least definitely not a good one, and there were plenty of other actors/artists/musicians out there that were far far better then me. But you know what? I had something to prove and I worked hard at getting better.

Alas, to no avail. This was really a year of discovery for me; just like it is for most people in their first years of college. I tried acting, arts and sports but nothing really helped me to find out who I was, what was my mark and how was I going to make it. In fact, this year is pretty much summed up by putting on a facade and pretending to be someone else. The relationships that I had and the friends that I made are mirror images of this fact; gone and never heard from again. A distant and fleeting shadow in my blur of college. Callous…but true. Then I found these photos again…

It reminds you of the best moments of life and the people that made it that way:

 

Awesome, now we’re getting somewhere. This is the beginning of me figuring out who I am and what I have done. My life just rammed into full stop and a reality check was waiting for me in the form of Outdoor Odyssey. I’m not going to explain what that organization is. It is far to complicated and the tangents that I would go on will make this the longest post in the history of WordPress. But here, this place…here is where I learned that I could impact lives.

Here is where I found the friends who I firmly believe are unmatched in the world. The family that will follow me and support me, still, to this very day. This place is where I discovered who I was and what I was meant to do. This is where I learned that I wanted to be a teacher and this is where I found my spot in the world.

The days in between those times just aren’t even worth mentioning. It was college and shit happened. ODO, that was real, that was life and just thinking about it and all the experiences that I had makes everything bad in the world seem so small and all the good things just jump out. Putting how the next 3 years of life felt for me is rather hard and I don’t really think I can do it justice…also it won’t mean anything to my readers that aren’t from Outdoor Odyssey, plus honestly I don’t care if you get it because this post is mine and mine alone. I’m actually quite surprised you’re reading this sentence. Kudos!

It forces nostalgia upon you and challenges you to remember when you thrived:

And then Cheley happened. This took what ODO taught me and put it the test. I was placed in charge of a massively huge program and put into the higher echelons of staff at a camp that barely new me and only saw me on paper before meeting me. I showed up 2 weeks early and wandered around the mountains of Colorado in the winter time, took some awesome photos and generally twiddled my thumbs and ate ramen.

 

 

But then the thaw came and I was ready to unleash a new torrent of life into people all around me and unleash I did. Everything that I was and everything that I new about art, teaching management, lessons, inspiration and how to keep people in the loop was firmly pressed into my initial surge of energy. I met some fantastic people from all over the world and I am pleased to say that I have friends from almost every major country, I’m quite sure every state in America, and that’s pretty cool.

Because to me that means that I’ve grown out of my box and that is success in this life. Cheley, you are an amazing place, you change lives.

You changed mine and gave me the courage and confidence to know that I can take control and I can make something better then what it was and leave it primed and ready for the next visionary to come.

It gently (read: VIOLENTLY) nudges you into being productive about life goals: 

After my brief stint in the Colorado Rockies, I ventured over to the beautiful redwood forests of California and lived for a time as a naturalist. Gained the name ‘Zephyr’ or ‘Zeph Zeph’ and learned even more about myself. I gained another family that I never suspected I would have.

Just like the amazing support that I receive from ODO, I now receive equal support from the SMOE natties. My time there not only firmly grounded my beliefs in education, but it also deeply rooted the idea of change and revolution into my mind.

It has always been my dream to open my own school. At first, I was basing it on other existing systems but then after living in a system with no system, except for the one that the teacher creates, and that allows you to engage with all intelligence types and age groups…whew! I found that I wasn’t just dissatisfied with the education in the world today…I HATE it and I want to change it. To bring it closer to the experiences that I’ve had at Cheley, at SMOE, and at ODO.

Power should be returned back to the teacher. Tests should abolished, grades should be kept but they should be…informal evaluations and talks about how you’re doing. Administrations should not do anything but keep the school running smoothly and there should be little to no crossover between the two parties. In fact, administration SHOULD be teachers and should also be rotated on a regular basis. Nothing gets stale that way and new ideas are always flowing. Each should simply trust the other to help out when it’s needed and to do the job that is given to them. By this, and only by this, will you allow a teacher to open up to their lessons and truly be educators, not simply instructors. You can’t teach from a book.You teach from life.

So now after 2 minor life crisis, a hiatus to the desert, an extended backpacking trip to run from society, a failed attempted at grad school, a journey halfway across the world and a crushing blow to my happy face…I’m ready to trust in education and life again. So bring it Japan. Let’s see what you got.

 

And there you have it…just by looking at Facebook photos I was reminded of life and all the great things it’s given me. Go on, go look back…see what you’ve forgotten. Maybe you’ll find new perspective too.

Matters of the heart

Relationships are difficult. I’ve had a plethora of them in my lifetime but only a handful have actually meant something. Is that shallow? Possibly, yes. But I argue that people who do not ‘date around’ have little concept of what they really want in relationships. Moreso, they probably have not learned how to handle conflicts in a healthy manner, deal with breakups or communicate effectively.

Those skills are not just relevant to relationships, they also spill heavily into the sewage systems of life where we put in life’s crap and eventually are returned clear, fresh water. It’s a complex process and there are so many parties involved and different events happening that often you forget which crap is your problem and which problems are just crap. Your issue is the important one, right? You have the crappiest problem floating down there and you demand to be comforted.

Truth is, we all need to be comforted when it comes to relationships. They are simply hard. Even the fairy tale type relationships, which absolutely exist in this world, have problems. The cold, hard fact is that no two people are a perfect match and that is what makes relationships interesting. So in an effort to deal with my own breakup, I would like to offer my two-cents to the world of relationship advice.

*DISCLAIMER* 

I came to Thailand with my girlfriend of 2 years. Before coming to Thailand we had that fairy tale relationship where everything clicked and the world was bright and joyous. But it was only through this experience that we realized we wanted different things in life. As of today, she got on a boat and is heading back to America after a short hiatus in Bali, Indonesia. I will not be joining her. Instead, I am going to Ashikaga, Japan to continue my travels and education experiences. Does it hurt? Hell yes. Am I okay? Yep. Did I love her? Stupid question. Next one, please. Are I going to give mildly cliche advice? Probably, but it’s from the heart, so stop asking questions and just read it. 

3 Most

Let people give you advice…even if you do not believe or agree with what they have to say. 

      Yep. Even the words I’m about to utter in this post should fall upon mildly deaf ears. Why am I saying that? Because we all deal with depression differently. You might hear a spectrum of advice such as, “Go get drunk.”,”Just have a rebound relationship.”,”Wanna talk about it?” to, my personal favorite, “Burn it. Burn it all.” The last one is pretty extreme, but I’ve done that and ,at the time, it felt good. Regardless of the advice that is given, there is an underlying comment being made, even the pyromaniacs are saying it, albeit in a very strange way. “I care about you and I want to help you.” Embrace that fact. You might just find that knowing someone is there is enough to get you through the worst of it and back on your feet. Once you accept that, go have your alone time, get those emotions out and then just be in the presence of someone else. You don’t have to talk or even look at them. Just know that you are not alone, because you are not.

By and by, my neighbors are Korean. They don’t speak much english but they are absolutely wonderful people. In my book, anyone who roasts their own coffee and then grinds it in the mornings can do no wrong. They recognize that I’m not particularly happy at the moment and have brought me food (and the aforementioned coffee) and generally have made their presence known…should I wish to join them. To me, that proves that despite language barriers or cultural differences, humans are inherently good and want to help others. So maybe that friend urging you to have an impromptu trashcan fire is really saying, “I know how hard this is for you. I’m right beside you and I’ll even throw in the first matchstick if you’d like.”. That is quite literally the fires of friendship burning for you.

Pictured: Stress Relief

Listen to music

     I’m not going to go into the psycho-analytical here. It should be very obvious that music affects our brains, bodies and souls. Ask any person and I can guarantee they have a list of ‘go to’ songs. Songs that make them happy, cause them to exercise harder, trigger nostalgia and memories or be more productive. The list is endless. Music is a visceral part of how we go about our days, and many of us have soundtracks to life. So…I’m going to give you a list of songs that I listen to when I’m sad. To you, these songs are just that, songs. But to me, they are extremely powerful gateways to my emotions and do all kinds of different things to my heart. I consider the following excellent songs, you may hate them, but if nothing else it might show you artists that you have yet to discover. I’m only going to list one song by each artist, but please know, they are fantastic musicians and deserve to be explored further. Thus without further ado:

Fall for you – Michael Henry and Justin Robinett  (Originally Secondhand Serenade)

Gone, Gone, Gone – Philip Phillips

Windows Are Rolled Down– Amos Lee

Company Of Friends – Danny Schmidt

I Will Wait – Mumford and Sons

The General – The Dispatch

Konstantine – Something Corporate

Sun Will Set – Zoe Keating

Last Goodbye – Wailing Jennys

World Spins Madly On – The Weepies

Okay, that should do it. Bottom line? Listen to music. It’s good for you and silence is awkward anyway…unless it’s with nature. Then silence is golden.

Pictured: Further Stress Relief

Exercise

     Got frustrations? Music not working and you hate everyone and everything? Go exercise. Endorphins are amazing and getting out all your emotional build up is much easier and healthier through working out then it is to say, scream into a pillow, eat a gallon of ice cream or plummet into despair. Hate running? Don’t like lifting weights and you can’t swim? Try yoga, Zumba, walking, etc. I’ll take a small wager and say that very very few people come back from working out and don’t feel at least a little better. If you need a more…aggressive approach, might I suggest a punching bag? Just be careful with that though, punching or kicking incorrectly can lead to injuries. But if you need to hit something, a punching bag is a better choice then a wall or your ex.

The best thing I can cook

Distract yourself

     Sometimes pain is simply to great to deal with and we need time to dull it. In this case, distract yourself. This can mean an almost innumerable amount of things. For me, this can take the form of being with friends, playing video games, art, playing guitar, household chores, shopping (yes, I like shopping) and cooking. Actually cooking is my go to. I LOVE to cook and anyone who has joined me in the kitchen knows that I take pride in making good food from simple ingredients. You can always tell when I’ve had a rough day because I’ll have made a three course meal and denied any offers for help.

Creating a distraction allows our subconscious to handle a few things without us knowing. It can only do so much though. Distracting yourself is good, however, don’t run from the emotions if they come to the surface. Face them, accept them and work on understanding the why and the what of each. Remember, your body and mind will give you what you can handle but those feelings aren’t going to disappear unless you approach them and see each for what it is and where it is originating from.

So that’s all. Take it or leave it and agree or not. You can probably find a slew of similar articles on both WordPress and liberally slathered across the internet. Like I mentioned in the beginning, this is only my thoughts and the experiences I am having now. Sharing it and also offering advice helped me to deal with the pain and I feel better because of it.

Thank you for listening.

-Jesse

Jesse get down!

So here I am again at a crossroads. There’s a lot of paths that are being offered to me and it’s difficult to choose which ones I want to walk. I’ve found that often times in life we are bottle-necked into only seeing 2 or 3 choices that can be made, when in reality there are so many more. Granted, some of those choices are just awful life decisions, but the others? They open up even more doors that reveal entire corridors to get lost in. Life is not a straight road, or even a divergence of many roads. It’s a maze with hidden places, elaborate candelabras, and a chute filled with snakes that takes you right back to the beginning…or the wine cellar. Every good maze should have a wine cellar. The true challenge is seeing the bookcase swing open when you pulled on that candlestick.

 Except…every now and then our paths look a bit like this:

Opportunity

There’s just so many ways to go that there is NO definate path to take. You need to forge your own. But having the courage to handle that, which is a daunting task, is perhaps the most difficult thing any person faces. When we make a decision, our roads narrow. But until that decision is made I hope you enjoy vast plains of opportunity.

Kurt Vonnegut said the following, “It’s an author’s right to change the words of their story. They can either re-write what is written or erase those words and start fresh.”

        So here’s the stories I can write and the paths I can take:

Get on

    A well-worn super highway in which 70% of my peers are traveling. Go back home to America, live with my parents and struggle to find a teaching job. Upon failing that, I’ll accept a minimum wage position despite a triple certification in education and multi-faceted experiences that grant me a very well rounded expertise. This is America’s roundabout that so many other teachers are driving in similar cars. We all have advanced degrees, multiple certifications and diverse work experience, that doesn’t set us apart anymore. So the great circle continues.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing to have hope on this highway. When I travelled it I was often disappointed about jobs that I didn’t receive, perceived opportunities that I missed and ultimately no schools recognizing the experience that I held. But, like I mentioned, every other teacher (or other profession) has the exact same problem. There’s nothing that truly sets each applicant apart and the sheer amount of resumes that employers get is staggering, thus it’s more about who you know before you’re resume is even reviewed and those differences are seen. To me? This road is luck of the draw and often the winning hand goes to family friends or acquaintances of the hirer. No, thank you.

Trail Ridge Road, Rocky Mountain National Park

     A back-country rural road that holds about 25% of the other teachers in the great roundabout. Go back home to America, refuse to live with my parents and struggle to find a teaching job or any job. Compound this by now adding the normal living expenses associated with having rent or a mortgage and moving to an area that I want to live in. Get right back on the roundabout and join that other 70% going in circles. There’s is an alternative path to this one though. Seasonal jobs. I personally consider seasonal positions to be the BEST way to see the country and meet people that have similar world views. The pay is never that great, but it’s more about the experience. Unfortunately, good things come to an end and that season is no different. Once it has ended, you are right back in Death Valley up there.  But hey, I’m different. I’m an independent, motivated person who is forging his own path. Do I live my parents? No. What’s that? You want to hire me? Fantastic! Oh…ah yes, I can make coffee. Yeah, $7.25/hr sounds great. I can totally do that.

Don’t get me wrong, I have meet AMAZING people and have had truly life changing experiences with this road. But every job that I’ve had on it has only been seasonal. I’ve lived in quite a few different places in America, bolstered by the experiences I was having and the people I interacted with. I lived this life for about 5 years. Within those years I have broaden my views, studied different forms of education, worked with people from all over the world and generally improved my soul. I like this road, and the people that walk it are just awesome. But in terms of finical stability, it’s simply not a viable option unless you are extremely talented and even more lucky that someone notices your skills. Would I walk this again? Hell yes. But it doesn’t solve anything in the long run.

Family

     The known of, but challenging, hiking trail that many ‘sub-culture’ teachers walk. Stay abroad, continue teaching in a foreign country make a wage that is less then the American minimum, but quite generous in regards to that country (disclaimer: I make approximately $3.00/hr in Thailand). Experience a different culture, see the world and beautiful scenery. Damage my chances of getting a job in America because most schools don’t enjoy Skype interviews and are very suspicious of an international teacher as well as generally look for consecutive years in a single district. A point of fact that I just do not comprehend. But it’s true, so this trails leads to continuing applying for jobs in America in hopes that a school recognizes my experiences and qualifications.

But that’s the negative. The positive? The individuals you meet wandering about the forest that this trail goes through are going to become life long friends. Not might. Will. These are the people that not only understand what is important in life and how little money matters, they are not afraid to be real with you and more so…themselves. It doesn’t matter what they do, the sparkling factor here is that they know who they are. Read that again. They are people who have struggled, risen, fallen and then got right back up with a smile. They aren’t people who are simply going through the motions. These are the ones who dance to their own songs, absorb the world and return that happiness tenfold. They will give you a hug when you least expect it and need it most; because they’ve been there and know what your far off gaze really is. Cherish them. They are rare in this world and often times are forced onto that super highway riding a single speed bicycle with a basket on the front. Give them a ride and you’ll make a friend who will support you no matter what you do.

Life

     A trail that is no trail and is only walked by those willing to go with the wind. I am a teacher. This thing I know. This is the life I have chosen regardless of the path that I take. I made a significant life decision by coming overseas and it’s going to shape the rest of my life. Not only because of the aforementioned other ways that I could have taken, but also the experience. Both the heavily positive and the crushingly negative have, in essence, changed me for the better. I have a broader view of the world, I speak another language (poorly) I never thought I’d learn and I now have close friends from every continent of the world and quite a few in-between. In a nutshell, that’s awesome. I like this path. I love it. Culture shock and miscommunications abound, but the good outweighs the bad and the personal growth tips the scales. I’m going to continue skipping down it and pretending the ground is lava because my head is in the clouds.

From here I go to there. From the balmy jungles of Thailand to the ancient mountains of Ashikaga, Japan…how can I be so sure of myself? I’m not. I have no idea what I’m doing. But I have support from all those people up there. That’s all I need.

Walk your own road.

Primordial Beauty

Rugged beauty. It’s a rare trait to give to a location that is so frequently destroyed by the machinations of man. Primordial, pristine, “pieces of it will stay with you”, I heard every one of those phrases used to describe the beauty that is Koh Mook. It’s been a while since I went to this island and I have been intending to write this blog for a some time, but as always life intervened. So here it is, Koh Mook.

Mook is an island that is heavily affected by the tides. Massive stone cliffs line the waters island where it meets the Adaman sea and at certain points during the low tide, it leaves every boat stranded upon the coastal sands. It’s a pretty amazing sight and really brings to mind being stranded. Because of this dramatic effect around the island, the coral here is especially spectacular and you can find the ocean life that prefers deeper waters as the tides recede to the point of being able to dive down deep enough. This exposes awesome critters like this jellyfish, which I believe is a box jelly, but I didn’t want to get close enough to properly identify it.

 These guys were everywhere in the water. Actually, I shouldn’t say that. Their babies were everywhere, the big ones were luckily few and far between. Although the littlest ones were almost impossible to see. This itty harbinger of pain reminded me that the ocean was not kind to the unwary. Attempting to get back to my kayak  and not stung proved to be an uphill battle.

It was not all for nothing though. The little guys looked like galaxies from underneath, and if I didn’t say, “This is a jellyfish.” Many people have assumed they are some kind of nebula. But not so! Just a helpful reminder to your nerve endings to let you know when you’re somewhere you should not be.

I learned my lesson pretty quickly after this encounter though. A few stings made me change my plan of snorkeling to a quick recon before diving in. Just look at that tan line. AMAZING! I make all the other severely burned white people jealous. 

Another really fantastic aspects of the dynamic coast here is that the cliffs are subjected to some serious erosions. More so then many of the other rock walls in the area.

Just look at how stunning that is. Seeing that, I agree with primordial and rugged. Koh Mook did indeed leave a lasting impression. These beautifully eroded cliffs have left underwater caves that can be accessed at low tide and one even leads to a hidden beach. Unfortunately, that beach is not so hidden and it’s flocked by very very eager tourists every day. The vast majority of them have no idea that all around them are potentially deadly jellyfish. I do not enjoy tour groups, they strike me as a way to see something instead of experience it. So, I spent my time diving in and around Emerald Cave attempting to not get kicked, drowned or stung by the multitude of legs there. There is great delight to be found in breaking the surface of the water right next to someone and seeing their face. Emerald cave was highly worth the potential visit to Davey Jones. Being in an underwater cave in total darkness and seeing the light at the entrance? Awesome.

Alas, after being given such a beautiful traverse in the cave, I ran headlong into where all the tour groups were going. Which…well..a photo will tell you exactly why I didn’t find this as beautiful as it should be. There was easily over 200 hundred people crammed into a very small beach that just ruined the moment. Tourism is a good thing. It shares the world with people that don’t know what is there. However…a beach, only accessible though an underwater cave filled with jellyfish, that is only above water during a small window of time which is compounded by the required low tide mark…

that should not be a tourist hotspot. Instead, it should be a well guarded secret only revealed to those who respect the  uniqueness of that wonder. This…this is simply unacceptable. 

Like I said, tourism is an important part of Thailand’s finical situation. But, they do not have an awareness yet of how the exploitation of their environment is dramatically affecting the health of beautiful places like this. Granted, this is an old problem that exists in almost every country. This minor gripe doesn’t detract too much from Koh Mook’s natural scene and in the end…this is an island that I will very gladly revisit.

Check out the gallery for more images of Koh Mook’s awesome scenery and  and a look at some of the dishes offered especially on the island!

.

Rubber farmers on Koh Mook

Coral

I have no idea what this critter is, but it’s lovely!

I could eat out of one.

More coral goodness

Yep, that’s Nemo

More jelly in the waters. I almost head butted this one

The very crowded beach at Emerald Cave

Grey water…yuck.

Underwater goodness in Emerald Cave

Diving and seeing schools of fish

More fishies.

The underwater conga line

Baby Jelly Galaxy

Wooly Chitton

Are there jellyfish?

Sandballs from sea crabs

I am a motor!

The blog is coffee barefoot after all

Tom Yum Ghung, garden resort style

More Tomy Yum

Charlie Resort, Koh Mook

How tourists live on Koh Mook

How the Thai live on Koh Mook

The waters out to sea

Sunny paths

Need some gas?

No idea what this is…but I like it!

Papaya tree

HUGE!

Terrifying

Just look at this spider…ugh

Banana flower

No, that’s not a fake leaf

Seastar!

The feelers

Beautiful sand dollar

Le Travel Companion

Farang Beach

The view from one of the restaurants at Koh Mook

The truth about travelers

This is just a perfect way to describe us. Satori has captured our souls and put it into words.

infinite satori

Press play first.

We have been called many things. Travelers, by default. But we like to be called nomads. Explorers. Vagabonds. Adventurers. Wayfarers. Modern gypsies. Wanderers. We’ve adopted them all. A growing breed of humans with restless feet and the inability to stay still, the inability to stay in one place.

That is who we are. And that’s just the gist of it.

We come from all walks of life, from bustling gray colored cities, sleepy beach towns, snow-covered metropolises, small villages nestled in between lush green mountains, we come from everywhere. But our inner gravity always brings us to the same place… the road.

We deem courage weighs more than money when it comes to travel. We’re not rich, not financially well-off and we don’t travel for luxury. Our money does not come from rich parents, trust funds, or whatever privileges you think we have in order to maintain…

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