The spin cycle of life.

 

 

Life often spins us around. Yet like any good dancer, it will signal you before the turn. Stay on your toes and keep up the beat, if you don’t it’s very easy to fall out of step and ruin the song. Lately, I’ve been swept into a waltz that has me crossing the dance floor multiple times. Those of you who follow my blog or talk to me regularly, know that I have had something of whirlwind in the past few months.

 

Around this time last year, I was preparing to go to Thailand and being interviewed for schools. I did not expect that almost a year later I would ever end up in Japan, nor that a relationship would crumble into open animosity and even less expecting is the fact that I am returning to America. A lot of things were out of my control and I just had to go with the flow. Obviously, there was some stressing out involved in between my transitions, but after six years of living the life of nomad, in one form or another, I’ve learned a few lessons.

 

Kinda like that

Wanderlust is not always wonderful 

I’ve seen the world, learned languages, experienced cultures and ways of living that are  dusk and dawn to America; it has been beautiful and wonderful. I wouldn’t trade my life for any other. Yet, there are huge swathes of time in which I have been fully alone unable to relate to the lives of others around me. As much as we travel towards a new horizon, we walk away from someone else’s.

No description is needed

There is fine line between being and living 

I’ve had many conversations about how important it is to live life, not be a life. To live is to make mistakes and learn. To climb to the highest mountain knowing your next step might send you tumbling down. It is to take a risk solely for the rewards, and then take another risk because you don’t care about the rewards anymore. Living is walking between stability and spontaneity. Those who have lived a life know when it’s time to move on, they do not hold onto bad relationships, will quit unsatisfied jobs and will embrace change like an old friend. Living is like being conscious of breathing. Without thinking about it, we sustain breath and stay alive. Yet, if you are aware of the breath, a calm focus occurs and we can not only direct how we breath, but also where and when we breath.

Giant field of mustard greens? Good place.

Smile. 

It’s a pretty simple thing. Smiling. The greatest teachers in life have laugh lines and I challenge you to think of someone that hasn’t inspired you that doesn’t. Let yourself be drawn to people that are quick to smile and even quicker with laughter. These people will laugh on a moments notice, find the humor in all things and support you throughout your journeys. They are not always happy because they have never had horrible things happen to them. They are always happy because the worse has happened to them and they’ve survived. It’s strange to say, but the people that smile the most tend to also have the most scars. They are the ones who are on the frontlines of life and it’s hard to dodge every bullet coming your way. If you find one of these people, pull them into your life. Make them a friend, a lover, a companion and a support. Give them all that they give you and you’ll quickly find that more loyal individuals cannot be found.

It’s harder to start walking, then it is to walk.

Remember lessons in love..then forget them. 

Our greatest lessons come from the greatest pain. We gain the most when we feel as if we’ve lost it all. This is nowhere more true then in love. Friends of mine will tell you that I love easily. It’s true. I do. But, there is a reason. I’ve been crushed and disappointed, lied to, manipulated and taken advantage of quite a few times. It’s through these lessons that I know exactly what I want because I know what I don’t want. Take down those walls, give up the key and let someone clean the dust out of your heart. Worse case scenario is things don’t go as planned but the cobwebs are finally out of the corner. Best case scenario? Well…that’s all in what you’re looking for isn’t it?

I can’t pronounce it right, but I can cook it!

Learn how to cook.

Put down that pack of ramen and don’t you dare go get fast food instead. Despite our refusal to admit this, cooking really should be the most basic of skills and still is in almost every other country except for first world. I am not saying you need to be a chef, but you should at least be able to go to the grocery store and make a variety of dishes from the local produce or whatever is in season. I’ve always loved cooking, so I admit to being biased, but if you burn everything you touch that is still not an excuse. If you insist on using that for your reason to go to taco bell then start with things that don’t require heat. Plus, cooking is a great stress relief and an even better moment for reflections.

 

I often have discussions with friends about what i’ve learned in my travels and how I think they apply to my life. I’m never quite sure how to answer them because almost everyday I learn something new. Something that builds upon what was already created. It’s a continually deluge of experiences that, hopefully, I will be able to pass on. Perhaps by better words or a clearer mind…but for now…Wander the world and live your life. Time doesn’t hold meaning and neither does age or circumstance. Despite all the woes and sorrows in the woe, the turmoil that rocks the foundations of our beliefs..smile, love, and when all else fails? Cook something to make it all better.

Fresh Yogurt

Fresh yogurt is extra tasty with cinnamon and nutmeg

   So I promised that I would make up for not posting often this month and start a series of traditional Japanese recipes. I will live up to that promise! The first I want to share is not necessarily Japanese, but it makes a fantastic substitute for Japanese mayonnaise (however, if you can get Japanese mayo, then by all means use it). A note on Japanese mayo though, it is a little bit different then the mayonnaise that you are used to. It handles and tastes different, plus it’s slightly healthier. But mayo is still mayo and some people won’t touch it even if it’s on their grocery shelf. So I’m going to teach you how to make homemade yogurt. It’s really simple and takes almost no effort at all. You can also use whatever type of milk that you like. It will change consistencies and fat content of the resulting yogurt, but still be delicious and I’ll teach you how to make it thicker as well once you are finished.

 

The shopping list!

 

1 Quart or 1 Liter of Milk (Whole and raw is the best, but skim and 2% work just as well) 

1/2 Cup of Plain Yogurt 

 

So the first step to this recipe is to get your milk. Personally, I prefer whole milk. It makes a far more rich yogurt. But, like I mentioned, skim milk is just as good and the recipe doesn’t change because of it.

Take the milk and heat it on the stove. Don’t heat it all the way to boiling, but almost. At this point, you simply remove it from the heat and allow to cool to around 110~120°F or 43 ~ 48°C. I don’t have always have a thermometer with me, but if I can stick my finger in the milk and not get scalded, but still be warm then chances are it’s good to go!

Once your milk is cooled, you simply need to whisk in around 1/2 cup of pre-existing yogurt. The cheap stuff works just fine. You just want the bacteria, not yogurt hand churned in an organic garden while a harp was being played. Although you can definitely do that to your own batch. It should have live cultures, but I have yet to run into any yogurt that does not have those. I will note however, that greek style yogurt does not work so well here.

After the yogurt is properly mixed in you’re next goal is to keep the baby yogurt at  around ~100°F or ~37°C. Much simpler then it sounds. I wrap my pot in a towel with the lid on and let it sit overnight. You can alternative keep it in the oven, put it in a thermal box (think picnic tote/cooler) or, if you’re fancy, in that yogurt incubator that’s been sitting in your basement for years.

 

That’s all! Just three steps.

 

Heat the milk (Almost to boiling) 

Allow the milk to cool 

Whisk in existing yogurt 

 

If you count putting the yogurt somewhere warm and then ignoring it for a night as a step, then I guess it’s really four steps.

 

Coolest thing about this? Once you make this recipe for the first time, it’s a self-replicating one. The yogurt you made can be used as the yogurt for future batches.

 

Oh? What’s that? You want your yogurt to be thick? Easy.

 

Instead of immediately putting the yogurt in the refrigerator. Layer a few cheesecloths or muslin, pour in the yogurt, tie the edges and let it hang and drain over the sink. Do it long enough and this will actually create a yogurt that is just like cream cheese and can be used as such! It’s very tasty and I recommend letting it hang to this consistency at least once. The yogurt will continue to get thicker as the hours go by and once it reaches the desired thickness place it in the refrigerator! 

3 Beautiful Bachelor/Bachelorette Bread Banterings…Book I

Allow me to paint you a picture…it’s 7am in the morning, you are blinking at the sudden glowing fireball in the sky wondering where it came from, the coffee is just starting to perk you up and your brain is slowing de-thawing from last night’s debauchery (I’m not here to judge..it’s okay.). Suddenly from the window you smell the heavenly scent of fresh baked bread and almost, just almost, you reach for your coat. But wait…no…the bakery down the street charges like $8 something for a tiny, though mouth watering-ly tasty, bun. Oh yeah, and the line stretches around the corner and there’s always that guy on his cellphone at 7:30am with a business call. Who has a business call at 7:30am anyway? Plus, that $8 dollars was spent on a disappointing, expensive microbrew made with Unicorn hair and the tears of a Mermaid.

Well, you’re just out of luck. Another morning with a stale, overpriced loaf chalked up with Diacetyl Tartaric Acid Esters of Monoglycerides and other silly dough conditioners that are just as hard to pronounce. Rejoice my friends. I’m going to teach you how to make, what I believe, to be 3 of the most versatile bread recipes that I know of. Starting with the easiest and least time consuming. As full disclosure, my recipes are loosely based on the titular Mark Bittman, whom if you aren’t aware, has two of the best cookbooks period. How To Cook Everything and How To Cook Everything Vegetarian.

Anyway…the first recipe!

Fresh Pita (or a basis from anything else you can think of) 

This one is dead simple and I happen to always have a batch or two in my freezer, if not sitting on the windowsill waiting to be accompanied with my meal. I use this primarily as a pita bread. Instead of forming a loaf after a rise, I just punch it down and roll it out a bit. Why? Because in my travels I’ve found that access to an oven is…well…normally nonexistent. But access to a fire, stove top or electric skillet? Always.

     Truly, this would make a fantastically moist and rich bread if you baked it in an oven. Better yet, inside a ceramic pot within an oven. That is beautiful bread. But lots of us don’t have access to those things. So a skillet or hot rock it is. Yep, these ones are backpacker friendly. So let’s get down to business.

Ingredients: 

3 cups of flour (I use all-purpose because it’s cheap, but if you have fancy triple-sifted organic stuff…use that!)

2 teaspoons of yeast (dry or instant yeast…either is fine due to the short rise time) 

2 teaspoons of salt 

1/2 teaspoon of sugar  

3 tablespoons of olive oil (my suggestion? Try using a flavored oil as it will lend it’s taste to the bread) 

~1 1/2 cups of warm water (right before testing finger ouchies..which for you science types is ~120°F-130°F) 

     Got those? Good, that’s just about the hardest part. For your first step, you simply have to mix together the dry ingredients. That’s the salt, sugar, yeast and flour.

Mix together your dry ingredients

     Now add the oil into that and mix it up until the dough seems like there’s a lot of tiny balls of oil locked in the dough. Honestly just whip around with a whisk, there’s nothing fancy to this step.

Add the oil to the mixed dry ingredients

Next slowly, did a mention slowly? SLOWLY add your water. That does not mean pour it slowly all at once. That means add a little bit.

Slowly add water to the mixture

     Mix the dough, add some more water, mix it again, continue this and then stop when your dough forms a slightly sticky ball. Done. Easy no? If your dough seems too sticky, you can add flour using the same process to get a more manageable ball.

Continue to add and mix until it starts sticking together

Stop once you get a ball form

     After this step, just cover it and walk away for about 2 hours. Obviously, you can allow it to rise longer and it will develop a more complex flavor, however, 2 hours works well for our purposes here. Although my typical method is to get to this step the night before and toss it into the fridge to rise overnight.

Get creative!!

Once you rough has risen you can knead it and form it into whatever shape you want, freeze it for later, or slice it up into smaller chunks and roll out some pita bread.

It fits so nicely in my containers when I’m meticulous!

     To make these in the skillet, simply turn it on to Medium-Medium High with just a little oil (or be a bit more indulgent and use butter) and fry them for about 4-5 minutes on both sides. They will get puffy and nicely golden brown.

Glorious

Just tonight I used this dough to make fresh hamburger buns and it was fantastic. All the juices of the meat and oil got absorbed but this bread is strong enough not to get soggy. That’s all there is to it! As a side note, you can also slice these and fill the middle in true ‘Pita’ style.

Happy bread making!

 

 

3 Beautiful Bachelor/Bachelorette Bread Banterings…Book I

Allow me to paint you a picture…it’s 7am in the morning, you are blinking at the sudden glowing fireball in the sky wondering where it came from, the coffee is just starting to perk you up and your brain is slowing de-thawing from last night’s debauchery (I’m not here to judge..it’s okay.). Suddenly from the window you smell the heavenly scent of fresh baked bread and almost, just almost, you reach for your coat. But wait…no…the bakery down the street charges like $8 something for a tiny, though mouth watering-ly tasty, bun. Oh yeah, and the line stretches around the corner and there’s always that guy on his cellphone at 7:30am with a business call. Who has a business call at 7:30am anyway? Plus, that $8 dollars was spent on a disappointing, expensive microbrew made with Unicorn hair and the tears of a Mermaid.

Well, you’re just out of luck. Another morning with a stale, overpriced loaf chalked up with Diacetyl Tartaric Acid Esters of Monoglycerides and other silly dough conditioners that are just as hard to pronounce. Rejoice my friends. I’m going to teach you how to make, what I believe, to be 3 of the most versatile bread recipes that I know of. Starting with the easiest and least time consuming. As full disclosure, my recipes are loosely based on the titular Mark Bittman, whom if you aren’t aware, has two of the best cookbooks period. How To Cook Everything and How To Cook Everything Vegetarian.

Anyway…the first recipe!

Fresh Pita (or a basis from anything else you can think of) 

This one is dead simple and I happen to always have a batch or two in my freezer, if not sitting on the windowsill waiting to be accompanied with my meal. I use this primarily as a pita bread. Instead of forming a loaf after a rise, I just punch it down and roll it out a bit. Why? Because in my travels I’ve found that access to an oven is…well…normally nonexistent. But access to a fire, stove top or electric skillet? Always.

     Truly, this would make a fantastically moist and rich bread if you baked it in an oven. Better yet, inside a ceramic pot within an oven. That is beautiful bread. But lots of us don’t have access to those things. So a skillet or hot rock it is. Yep, these ones are backpacker friendly. So let’s get down to business.

Ingredients: 

3 cups of flour (I use all-purpose because it’s cheap, but if you have fancy triple-sifted organic stuff…use that!)

2 teaspoons of yeast (dry or instant yeast…either is fine due to the short rise time) 

2 teaspoons of salt 

1/2 teaspoon of sugar  

3 tablespoons of olive oil (my suggestion? Try using a flavored oil as it will lend it’s taste to the bread) 

~1 1/2 cups of warm water (right before testing finger ouchies..which for you science types is ~120°F-130°F) 

     Got those? Good, that’s just about the hardest part. For your first step, you simply have to mix together the dry ingredients. That’s the salt, sugar, yeast and flour.

     Now add the oil into that and mix it up until the dough seems like there’s a lot of tiny balls of oil locked in the dough. Honestly just whip around with a whisk, there’s nothing fancy to this step.

Next slowly, did a mention slowly? SLOWLY add your water. That does not mean pour it slowly all at once. That means add a little bit.

     Mix the dough, add some more water, mix it again, continue this and then stop when your dough forms a slightly sticky ball. Done. Easy no? If your dough seems too sticky, you can add flour using the same process to get a more manageable ball.

     After this step, just cover it and walk away for about 2 hours. Obviously, you can allow it to rise longer and it will develop a more complex flavor, however, 2 hours works well for our purposes here. Although my typical method is to get to this step the night before and toss it into the fridge to rise overnight.

Once you rough has risen you can knead it and form it into whatever shape you want, freeze it for later, or slice it up into smaller chunks and roll out some pita bread.

     To make these in the skillet, simply turn it on to Medium-Medium High with just a little oil (or be a bit more indulgent and use butter) and fry them for about 4-5 minutes on both sides. They will get puffy and nicely golden brown.

Just tonight I used this dough to make fresh hamburger buns and it was fantastic. All the juices of the meat and oil got absorbed but this bread is strong enough not to get soggy. That’s all there is to it! As a side note, you can also slice these and fill the middle in true ‘Pita’ style.

Happy bread making!

 

 

On the virtue of Facebook

Disclaimer: 

This post is not for anyone but myself if you don’t care to read more about me and my past then I highly suggest you wait until my next posting. I will be teaching you how to make fresh pita bread from scratch but until then…you’ve been warned.

Secondary Disclaimer: 

Indeed, I am praising Facebook. But only because of what it CAN do…not what it DOES do. Want a reality check? Go look through you Facebook photos from start to finish. Come back to me and tell that you didn’t just have new perspective on your life. That is what Facebook should do, reconnect you with life, family and friends. Not tell me to like your silly personality test from Buzzredtwitgawk.com

I have lived an amazing and wonderful life. As you well know I just went through a pretty major breakup and I needed a change. That change was Japan. Was it the right choice? I don’t know, but here I am now and I’ve been asked to tell the Ashikaga Board of Education about my life, what I like and what I have done, etc. That is a seriously hard question to answer and I’ve been thinking about it pretty heavily lately. Even without the added incentive to divulge my life in front of very well dressed people drinking tea.

Definitely one of the best things in Japan. The tea is ridiculously good.

The conclusion that I came up with is that my life is astoundingly good and I have been blessed with so many amazing experiences and even more fantastic people. I can honestly say I have grown into far more then I ever imagined possible. There are times in your life when you are sad and lonely; wondering what happened to all the happiness that you used to have. Honestly, I’m going through that right now and, though I rarely do this, I’m looking at my old Facebook photos from when I first began Facebook. Something like 8 years ago, maybe 9..10 (How old is Facebook?), I’m not really sure. What I am sure of is that there is nothing for me to be sad about and the experiences that I’ve gained and the lessons I’ve learned… well some people travel their entire lives and don’t learn them. I’ve been blessed to learned them at the ripe age of 27.

Upon looking back, I started tearing up and crying with a giant huge smile and thousands of warm memories wrapping me in the embrace that only years of life can bring. Years of life in where you are truly given the freedom to be who you are. Not a year has gone by that I haven’t challenged myself and grown into more then I am. I didn’t even realize it upon looking back on Facebook. I’m striving unconsciously to discover even more facets of what I can do and where I belong in the world. So looking back I found myself reminiscing just a little bit about what I’ve done in each of these years. More as a reminder that I am somebody in the world and I have made an impact. So here it goes…the virtues of Facebook.

It will remind of just how much life you have lived and how far you’ve grown: 

Is this one of the worst photos I could find? You betcha.

Oh man, look at that punk high school kid fresh out of school and in a big college up on Lake Erie. Damn, I thought I was something. Little did i know that I am not an artist, at least definitely not a good one, and there were plenty of other actors/artists/musicians out there that were far far better then me. But you know what? I had something to prove and I worked hard at getting better.

Every college study group…ever.

Alas, to no avail. This was really a year of discovery for me; just like it is for most people in their first years of college. I tried acting, arts and sports but nothing really helped me to find out who I was, what was my mark and how was I going to make it. In fact, this year is pretty much summed up by putting on a facade and pretending to be someone else. The relationships that I had and the friends that I made are mirror images of this fact; gone and never heard from again. A distant and fleeting shadow in my blur of college. Callous…but true. Then I found these photos again…

It reminds you of the best moments of life and the people that made it that way:

Because sometimes a reminder is all that’s needed

 

Awesome, now we’re getting somewhere. This is the beginning of me figuring out who I am and what I have done. My life just rammed into full stop and a reality check was waiting for me in the form of Outdoor Odyssey. I’m not going to explain what that organization is. It is far to complicated and the tangents that I would go on will make this the longest post in the history of WordPress. But here, this place…here is where I learned that I could impact lives.

There’s always a helping hand

Occasionally that required placing my Chacos in unsavory areas

Here is where I found the friends who I firmly believe are unmatched in the world. The family that will follow me and support me, still, to this very day. This place is where I discovered who I was and what I was meant to do. This is where I learned that I wanted to be a teacher and this is where I found my spot in the world.

The days in between those times just aren’t even worth mentioning. It was college and shit happened. ODO, that was real, that was life and just thinking about it and all the experiences that I had makes everything bad in the world seem so small and all the good things just jump out. Putting how the next 3 years of life felt for me is rather hard and I don’t really think I can do it justice…also it won’t mean anything to my readers that aren’t from Outdoor Odyssey, plus honestly I don’t care if you get it because this post is mine and mine alone. I’m actually quite surprised you’re reading this sentence. Kudos!

Pictured: Possibilities

It forces nostalgia upon you and challenges you to remember when you thrived:

And then Cheley happened. This took what ODO taught me and put it the test. I was placed in charge of a massively huge program and put into the higher echelons of staff at a camp that barely new me and only saw me on paper before meeting me. I showed up 2 weeks early and wandered around the mountains of Colorado in the winter time, took some awesome photos and generally twiddled my thumbs and ate ramen.

Not pictured: Ramen

 

 

But then the thaw came and I was ready to unleash a new torrent of life into people all around me and unleash I did. Everything that I was and everything that I new about art, teaching management, lessons, inspiration and how to keep people in the loop was firmly pressed into my initial surge of energy. I met some fantastic people from all over the world and I am pleased to say that I have friends from almost every major country, I’m quite sure every state in America, and that’s pretty cool.

Because to me that means that I’ve grown out of my box and that is success in this life. Cheley, you are an amazing place, you change lives.

Occasionally life can be capture in a photo

You changed mine and gave me the courage and confidence to know that I can take control and I can make something better then what it was and leave it primed and ready for the next visionary to come.

Decided not Facebook

It gently (read: VIOLENTLY) nudges you into being productive about life goals: 

After my brief stint in the Colorado Rockies, I ventured over to the beautiful redwood forests of California and lived for a time as a naturalist. Gained the name ‘Zephyr’ or ‘Zeph Zeph’ and learned even more about myself. I gained another family that I never suspected I would have.

Yep. I’m a hippie teacher. What? You didn’t know?

Just like the amazing support that I receive from ODO, I now receive equal support from the SMOE natties. My time there not only firmly grounded my beliefs in education, but it also deeply rooted the idea of change and revolution into my mind.

It has always been my dream to open my own school. At first, I was basing it on other existing systems but then after living in a system with no system, except for the one that the teacher creates, and that allows you to engage with all intelligence types and age groups…whew! I found that I wasn’t just dissatisfied with the education in the world today…I HATE it and I want to change it. To bring it closer to the experiences that I’ve had at Cheley, at SMOE, and at ODO.

Power should be returned back to the teacher. Tests should abolished, grades should be kept but they should be…informal evaluations and talks about how you’re doing. Administrations should not do anything but keep the school running smoothly and there should be little to no crossover between the two parties. In fact, administration SHOULD be teachers and should also be rotated on a regular basis. Nothing gets stale that way and new ideas are always flowing. Each should simply trust the other to help out when it’s needed and to do the job that is given to them. By this, and only by this, will you allow a teacher to open up to their lessons and truly be educators, not simply instructors. You can’t teach from a book.You teach from life.

So now after 2 minor life crisis, a hiatus to the desert, an extended backpacking trip to run from society, a failed attempted at grad school, a journey halfway across the world and a crushing blow to my happy face…I’m ready to trust in education and life again. So bring it Japan. Let’s see what you got.

Ah. Cherry Blossoms…well played Japan. Well played. Rebirth it is.

 

And there you have it…just by looking at Facebook photos I was reminded of life and all the great things it’s given me. Go on, go look back…see what you’ve forgotten. Maybe you’ll find new perspective too.

On the virtue of Facebook

Disclaimer: 

This post is not for anyone but myself if you don’t care to read more about me and my past then I highly suggest you wait until my next posting. I will be teaching you how to make fresh pita bread from scratch but until then…you’ve been warned.

Secondary Disclaimer: 

Indeed, I am praising Facebook. But only because of what it CAN do…not what it DOES do. Want a reality check? Go look through you Facebook photos from start to finish. Come back to me and tell that you didn’t just have new perspective on your life. That is what Facebook should do, reconnect you with life, family and friends. Not tell me to like your silly personality test from Buzzredtwitgawk.com

I have lived an amazing and wonderful life. As you well know I just went through a pretty major breakup and I needed a change. That change was Japan. Was it the right choice? I don’t know, but here I am now and I’ve been asked to tell the Ashikaga Board of Education about my life, what I like and what I have done, etc. That is a seriously hard question to answer and I’ve been thinking about it pretty heavily lately. Even without the added incentive to divulge my life in front of very well dressed people drinking tea.

The conclusion that I came up with is that my life is astoundingly good and I have been blessed with so many amazing experiences and even more fantastic people. I can honestly say I have grown into far more then I ever imagined possible. There are times in your life when you are sad and lonely; wondering what happened to all the happiness that you used to have. Honestly, I’m going through that right now and, though I rarely do this, I’m looking at my old Facebook photos from when I first began Facebook. Something like 8 years ago, maybe 9..10 (How old is Facebook?), I’m not really sure. What I am sure of is that there is nothing for me to be sad about and the experiences that I’ve gained and the lessons I’ve learned… well some people travel their entire lives and don’t learn them. I’ve been blessed to learned them at the ripe age of 27.

Upon looking back, I started tearing up and crying with a giant huge smile and thousands of warm memories wrapping me in the embrace that only years of life can bring. Years of life in where you are truly given the freedom to be who you are. Not a year has gone by that I haven’t challenged myself and grown into more then I am. I didn’t even realize it upon looking back on Facebook. I’m striving unconsciously to discover even more facets of what I can do and where I belong in the world. So looking back I found myself reminiscing just a little bit about what I’ve done in each of these years. More as a reminder that I am somebody in the world and I have made an impact. So here it goes…the virtues of Facebook.

It will remind of just how much life you have lived and how far you’ve grown: 

Oh man, look at that punk high school kid fresh out of school and in a big college up on Lake Erie. Damn, I thought I was something. Little did i know that I am not an artist, at least definitely not a good one, and there were plenty of other actors/artists/musicians out there that were far far better then me. But you know what? I had something to prove and I worked hard at getting better.

Alas, to no avail. This was really a year of discovery for me; just like it is for most people in their first years of college. I tried acting, arts and sports but nothing really helped me to find out who I was, what was my mark and how was I going to make it. In fact, this year is pretty much summed up by putting on a facade and pretending to be someone else. The relationships that I had and the friends that I made are mirror images of this fact; gone and never heard from again. A distant and fleeting shadow in my blur of college. Callous…but true. Then I found these photos again…

It reminds you of the best moments of life and the people that made it that way:

 

Awesome, now we’re getting somewhere. This is the beginning of me figuring out who I am and what I have done. My life just rammed into full stop and a reality check was waiting for me in the form of Outdoor Odyssey. I’m not going to explain what that organization is. It is far to complicated and the tangents that I would go on will make this the longest post in the history of WordPress. But here, this place…here is where I learned that I could impact lives.

Here is where I found the friends who I firmly believe are unmatched in the world. The family that will follow me and support me, still, to this very day. This place is where I discovered who I was and what I was meant to do. This is where I learned that I wanted to be a teacher and this is where I found my spot in the world.

The days in between those times just aren’t even worth mentioning. It was college and shit happened. ODO, that was real, that was life and just thinking about it and all the experiences that I had makes everything bad in the world seem so small and all the good things just jump out. Putting how the next 3 years of life felt for me is rather hard and I don’t really think I can do it justice…also it won’t mean anything to my readers that aren’t from Outdoor Odyssey, plus honestly I don’t care if you get it because this post is mine and mine alone. I’m actually quite surprised you’re reading this sentence. Kudos!

It forces nostalgia upon you and challenges you to remember when you thrived:

And then Cheley happened. This took what ODO taught me and put it the test. I was placed in charge of a massively huge program and put into the higher echelons of staff at a camp that barely new me and only saw me on paper before meeting me. I showed up 2 weeks early and wandered around the mountains of Colorado in the winter time, took some awesome photos and generally twiddled my thumbs and ate ramen.

 

 

But then the thaw came and I was ready to unleash a new torrent of life into people all around me and unleash I did. Everything that I was and everything that I new about art, teaching management, lessons, inspiration and how to keep people in the loop was firmly pressed into my initial surge of energy. I met some fantastic people from all over the world and I am pleased to say that I have friends from almost every major country, I’m quite sure every state in America, and that’s pretty cool.

Because to me that means that I’ve grown out of my box and that is success in this life. Cheley, you are an amazing place, you change lives.

You changed mine and gave me the courage and confidence to know that I can take control and I can make something better then what it was and leave it primed and ready for the next visionary to come.

It gently (read: VIOLENTLY) nudges you into being productive about life goals: 

After my brief stint in the Colorado Rockies, I ventured over to the beautiful redwood forests of California and lived for a time as a naturalist. Gained the name ‘Zephyr’ or ‘Zeph Zeph’ and learned even more about myself. I gained another family that I never suspected I would have.

Just like the amazing support that I receive from ODO, I now receive equal support from the SMOE natties. My time there not only firmly grounded my beliefs in education, but it also deeply rooted the idea of change and revolution into my mind.

It has always been my dream to open my own school. At first, I was basing it on other existing systems but then after living in a system with no system, except for the one that the teacher creates, and that allows you to engage with all intelligence types and age groups…whew! I found that I wasn’t just dissatisfied with the education in the world today…I HATE it and I want to change it. To bring it closer to the experiences that I’ve had at Cheley, at SMOE, and at ODO.

Power should be returned back to the teacher. Tests should abolished, grades should be kept but they should be…informal evaluations and talks about how you’re doing. Administrations should not do anything but keep the school running smoothly and there should be little to no crossover between the two parties. In fact, administration SHOULD be teachers and should also be rotated on a regular basis. Nothing gets stale that way and new ideas are always flowing. Each should simply trust the other to help out when it’s needed and to do the job that is given to them. By this, and only by this, will you allow a teacher to open up to their lessons and truly be educators, not simply instructors. You can’t teach from a book.You teach from life.

So now after 2 minor life crisis, a hiatus to the desert, an extended backpacking trip to run from society, a failed attempted at grad school, a journey halfway across the world and a crushing blow to my happy face…I’m ready to trust in education and life again. So bring it Japan. Let’s see what you got.

 

And there you have it…just by looking at Facebook photos I was reminded of life and all the great things it’s given me. Go on, go look back…see what you’ve forgotten. Maybe you’ll find new perspective too.

Jesse get down!

So here I am again at a crossroads. There’s a lot of paths that are being offered to me and it’s difficult to choose which ones I want to walk. I’ve found that often times in life we are bottle-necked into only seeing 2 or 3 choices that can be made, when in reality there are so many more. Granted, some of those choices are just awful life decisions, but the others? They open up even more doors that reveal entire corridors to get lost in. Life is not a straight road, or even a divergence of many roads. It’s a maze with hidden places, elaborate candelabras, and a chute filled with snakes that takes you right back to the beginning…or the wine cellar. Every good maze should have a wine cellar. The true challenge is seeing the bookcase swing open when you pulled on that candlestick.

 Except…every now and then our paths look a bit like this:

Opportunity

There’s just so many ways to go that there is NO definate path to take. You need to forge your own. But having the courage to handle that, which is a daunting task, is perhaps the most difficult thing any person faces. When we make a decision, our roads narrow. But until that decision is made I hope you enjoy vast plains of opportunity.

Kurt Vonnegut said the following, “It’s an author’s right to change the words of their story. They can either re-write what is written or erase those words and start fresh.”

        So here’s the stories I can write and the paths I can take:

Get on

    A well-worn super highway in which 70% of my peers are traveling. Go back home to America, live with my parents and struggle to find a teaching job. Upon failing that, I’ll accept a minimum wage position despite a triple certification in education and multi-faceted experiences that grant me a very well rounded expertise. This is America’s roundabout that so many other teachers are driving in similar cars. We all have advanced degrees, multiple certifications and diverse work experience, that doesn’t set us apart anymore. So the great circle continues.

It’s not necessarily a bad thing to have hope on this highway. When I travelled it I was often disappointed about jobs that I didn’t receive, perceived opportunities that I missed and ultimately no schools recognizing the experience that I held. But, like I mentioned, every other teacher (or other profession) has the exact same problem. There’s nothing that truly sets each applicant apart and the sheer amount of resumes that employers get is staggering, thus it’s more about who you know before you’re resume is even reviewed and those differences are seen. To me? This road is luck of the draw and often the winning hand goes to family friends or acquaintances of the hirer. No, thank you.

Trail Ridge Road, Rocky Mountain National Park

     A back-country rural road that holds about 25% of the other teachers in the great roundabout. Go back home to America, refuse to live with my parents and struggle to find a teaching job or any job. Compound this by now adding the normal living expenses associated with having rent or a mortgage and moving to an area that I want to live in. Get right back on the roundabout and join that other 70% going in circles. There’s is an alternative path to this one though. Seasonal jobs. I personally consider seasonal positions to be the BEST way to see the country and meet people that have similar world views. The pay is never that great, but it’s more about the experience. Unfortunately, good things come to an end and that season is no different. Once it has ended, you are right back in Death Valley up there.  But hey, I’m different. I’m an independent, motivated person who is forging his own path. Do I live my parents? No. What’s that? You want to hire me? Fantastic! Oh…ah yes, I can make coffee. Yeah, $7.25/hr sounds great. I can totally do that.

Don’t get me wrong, I have meet AMAZING people and have had truly life changing experiences with this road. But every job that I’ve had on it has only been seasonal. I’ve lived in quite a few different places in America, bolstered by the experiences I was having and the people I interacted with. I lived this life for about 5 years. Within those years I have broaden my views, studied different forms of education, worked with people from all over the world and generally improved my soul. I like this road, and the people that walk it are just awesome. But in terms of finical stability, it’s simply not a viable option unless you are extremely talented and even more lucky that someone notices your skills. Would I walk this again? Hell yes. But it doesn’t solve anything in the long run.

Family

     The known of, but challenging, hiking trail that many ‘sub-culture’ teachers walk. Stay abroad, continue teaching in a foreign country make a wage that is less then the American minimum, but quite generous in regards to that country (disclaimer: I make approximately $3.00/hr in Thailand). Experience a different culture, see the world and beautiful scenery. Damage my chances of getting a job in America because most schools don’t enjoy Skype interviews and are very suspicious of an international teacher as well as generally look for consecutive years in a single district. A point of fact that I just do not comprehend. But it’s true, so this trails leads to continuing applying for jobs in America in hopes that a school recognizes my experiences and qualifications.

But that’s the negative. The positive? The individuals you meet wandering about the forest that this trail goes through are going to become life long friends. Not might. Will. These are the people that not only understand what is important in life and how little money matters, they are not afraid to be real with you and more so…themselves. It doesn’t matter what they do, the sparkling factor here is that they know who they are. Read that again. They are people who have struggled, risen, fallen and then got right back up with a smile. They aren’t people who are simply going through the motions. These are the ones who dance to their own songs, absorb the world and return that happiness tenfold. They will give you a hug when you least expect it and need it most; because they’ve been there and know what your far off gaze really is. Cherish them. They are rare in this world and often times are forced onto that super highway riding a single speed bicycle with a basket on the front. Give them a ride and you’ll make a friend who will support you no matter what you do.

Life

     A trail that is no trail and is only walked by those willing to go with the wind. I am a teacher. This thing I know. This is the life I have chosen regardless of the path that I take. I made a significant life decision by coming overseas and it’s going to shape the rest of my life. Not only because of the aforementioned other ways that I could have taken, but also the experience. Both the heavily positive and the crushingly negative have, in essence, changed me for the better. I have a broader view of the world, I speak another language (poorly) I never thought I’d learn and I now have close friends from every continent of the world and quite a few in-between. In a nutshell, that’s awesome. I like this path. I love it. Culture shock and miscommunications abound, but the good outweighs the bad and the personal growth tips the scales. I’m going to continue skipping down it and pretending the ground is lava because my head is in the clouds.

From here I go to there. From the balmy jungles of Thailand to the ancient mountains of Ashikaga, Japan…how can I be so sure of myself? I’m not. I have no idea what I’m doing. But I have support from all those people up there. That’s all I need.

Walk your own road.